In last week’s post I wrote about two books, One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp and Remember the Sweet Things by Ellen Greene, and how the practice of keeping lists has made a difference in my life and my marriage. (Recap Here)
After receiving all kinds of positive feedback I decided to follow-up with ten tips for keeping a list…AND a GIVEAWAY complete with everything you need to start a list(s) of your own. I hope you’ll enter to win (details below) and I hope you’ll be inspired.
The practice of loving and listing has changed my life forever. It is my hope and prayer that the same will be true for you.
10 Tips for Loving and Listing
No. 1: Focus on persistence instead of perfection
Let’s face it, no matter how intentional we aim to be life comes at us hard, and in the practice of loving and listing it’s easy to get distracted. The point isn’t perfection. The point is being persistent to keep the list going, to always start again, to not become discouraged when your rhythm gets broken. You will miss days. You will miss weeks. And that’s okay. Keep listing!
No. 2: It’s okay to start and stop…it’s not okay to quit
Similarly, if you’re anything like me, you’ll find that there are entire phases of life when your journal/list falls completely off the radar. And you know what? This is okay too. Again the point is not to stop. When a season flies by without any entries in your journal don’t give up. Cover it in grace and start again. Don’t try to fill in the time or season you missed. Start fresh and keep going.
No. 3: Leave your journal open or easily accessible
If your journal is where you can see it, it will be much easier to think about it throughout the day. Keeping mine on the corner of my dresser works well for me. As I pass by throughout the day I jot down lines when I have a minute or two. Keeping it handy also creates the opportunity for my husband to pick it up and read it. Doing this helps to keep both our hearts soft and engaged, our eyes open and focused on blessings.
No. 4: Keep notes on the go
When your journal isn’t available keep notes on the go. Stick a small notepad in your purse or use an app on your phone. Scribble down thoughts on your hand or put a dry erase board on your fridge to save your thoughts for later. As you’re able, add these notes to your journal.
No. 5: Make listing a family affair
The practice of loving and listing is a great habit to teach your kids and share with those you love. In our household we have a blessing tree. There are tons of ways to invite others into the fun of listing. Find a few that work for your family and see the difference it makes in your home.
No. 6: Include pictures and other keepsakes
No. 7: Use as a gift for a special occasion
Whenever a birthday or special occasion rolls around I love to fill cards for family and friends with a list of things I love about them or reasons why I’m thankful they’re in my life. Filling an entire journal for your spouse or a treasured love one is another way to create a meaningful gift. Be creative! Go crazy! There is no end to the joy this brings.
No. 8: Read and re-read your list
Periodically reading your list will both encourage you to keep it going and also remind you of special moments and blessings already recorded. Use it to ward off discouragement, doubt, depression, and division between you and your spouse.
No. 9: Record the mundane and seemingly insignificant
Sometimes thoughts come to mind that seem too trivial or insignificant to list but as your list grows you’ll find that these are the things that make your list worth keeping. These are the things that would otherwise go unnoticed, unremembered. Fill your list with the big and the small because life is lived in moments and all of them are worth noting.
No. 10: Record the good, the bad, and the ugly
No matter how much you practice the art of loving and listing there will always be things about life and about your spouse that hurt you, disappoint you, and drive you absolutely crazy. Make it a point to list these things too. Ann Voskamp calls this the ‘Beautiful Ugly.’ By giving thanks, by choosing to love even in the hard, the bad, the ugly, we are choosing grace. We’re choosing to keep our hearts wide open. This is profound. This is how a list starts to change a life.
Bottom Line: Marriage and joy are two things that are constantly under attack. Why not fight for them, protect them, anyway we can?
The books, the journals, the pages full are weapons in the battle. Fill up a journal and you just might find you’re filling up your life with lines of love and thanksgiving.
Sharper than any sword.
Included in this Giveaway:
One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp
Remember the Sweet Things by Ellen Greene
~ PLUS ~
Two Journals to get you started
To enter, leave me a comment in the field below. The winner will be selected by random drawing and announced in next Wednesday’s post.
What are some things you love about your spouse?
What are you thankful for today?
What’s on your mind?
I’d love to hear from you…
So good to read your blog! Of course, you already know how sold I at keeping my “gifts journal”! I’m so thankful for your Dad’s patience, gentleness, soft spokeness, love for me and his girls and “grands”, his generosity, faithfulness, and his love for The Lord. (Only to mention a few)
Today I am thankful for my Jennifer who continues to bless my heart with her writing abilities and her commitment and loyalty to her husband and girls.
Thanks, Mom! Your comments always warm my heart.
One of the things I’m super grateful for is… you!
And I feel the same about you!